Poached Salmon

“Some 95,400 fish were killed by a new device called a thermolicer … The ‘sudden temperature change’ caused by the thermolicer killed 95 per cent of the lice but also caused ‘significant mortalities’ amongst the salmon. … Another 20,000 salmon were killed at Loch Greshornish fish farm by other attempts to rid them of sea lice using chemicals. … 60,000 salmon had been killed by hydrogen peroxide used to treat them for amoebic gill disease.” (http://www.heraldscotland.com/news/environment/14846303.Oops__fish_farm_firm_kills_175_000_of_its_salmon_by_accident/)

‘Overkill’.

Smelly Plants

“The Scottish Environment Protection Agency (Sepa) has named 383 plants guilty of leaks, pongs and breaches in 2015.” (http://www.heraldscotland.com/news/environment/14884352.Exposed__the_383_plants_that_pollute_Scotland/)

Have we passed peak pong,
Or is this leak long?
Time we pung out those leeches –
Show them who wears the breeches!
Will SEPA make speeches
Or fight them on the breaches?

Blogger Whales

“The depleted designation makes it illegal to import any belugas from this population into the United States for public display … ‘This final decision puts the United States solidly on the high ground in future collaborative efforts to provide additional protections for these beleaguered whales.'” (http://uk.whales.org/news/2016/10/nmfs-designation-of-russian-beluga-whales-depleted-makes-their-import-into-us-illegal)

The US is on shakier ground with the species name.

Stuff the Birds

“When the ground is wet and the heather dry, gamekeepers conduct managed burns to stop the heather getting too high … because if it does, dangerous wildfires take place which destroy ecosystems and also set fire to the peat beneath, which can then burn for years.” (https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2016/oct/31/grouse-moors-subsidised-taxpayers-shooting-moorland)

Grouse shooters can’t see the moors for the blaze.

“The heather thrives on wet conditions, so gamekeepers put a lot of effort into keeping the soil damp.”

This is necessary because all the rain has run off and flooded any settlements downstream. Thankfully climate change is bringing welcome warmer, wetter conditions.

“Taxidermists to taxi drivers and chimney sweeps to rural internet specialists … have been telling MPs how their livelihoods would be at risk if opponents of shooting had their way.”

Curious satellite-tag signals continue to emit from stuffed birds of prey in glass domes.

Weegie Wrecks

“As one of very few surviving paddle steamer wrecks, Iona I makes a significant contribution to the cultural landscape of the Clyde basin and our understanding of Clyde paddle steamers.” (http://news.gov.scot/news/new-protected-marine-areas-announced)

Surviving wrecks of paddling steamers in the Clyde environs are actually plentiful. Bless Glesga’s cultural landscape.

Game Gems

Supporting driven grouse shooting at the parliamentary debate on 31 October:

“If you cease burning, you get long, degenerate, rank heather, which is unsightly”
Sir Nicholas Soames (Mid Sussex) (Con) https://goo.gl/NKirCJ

“The main perpetrator of the petition”
Richard Benyon (Newbury) (Con) https://goo.gl/odPPWC

“There were blackcock, golden plover, woodcock, snipe, jack snipe, greylag geese, teal, widgeon, mallard, gadwall, pintail and even, right outt in the middle of the moor, miles from anywhere, a wild chicken. I am not sure whether there are wild chicken, but there was a chicken that was probably not born and brought up there.”
Simon Hart (Carmarthen West and South Pembrokeshire) (Con) https://goo.gl/hVq3Wj