My Great Bill

Polish “environmental EcoLogic Group placed a tracker on the back of a white stork last year to track the bird’s migratory habits. It travelled some 3,700 miles (6,000kms), and was traced to the Blue Nile Valley in eastern Sudan before the charity lost contact. … Somebody found the tracker in Sudan, removed the sim card and put it in their own phone, where they then racked up 20 hours’ worth of phone calls. … The organisation has received a phone bill of over 10,000 Polish zloty ($2,700; £2,064)” https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/blogs-news-from-elsewhere-44645217

It’s good to stork, but beware of roaming charges, especially if you’re hard of heron.

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Grate

The EU climate chief said “if we have an ongoing process you can not say it is a failure if the mitigration commitments do not reach 2C.” (http://www.theguardian.com/environment/2015/feb/04/paris-climate-summit-missing-global-warming-target-would-not-be-failure)

Mitigration – moving quietly away from obligation to reduce impacts.

Featherwit

“The bird leaves New Zealand in March to fly some 10,000km to feeding grounds in China and the Koreas. And then in May, the godwit undertakes a 6,000km trip to western Alaska to breed and nest, before returning directly to New Zealand across the Pacific in August/September.” (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/science-environment-25274483)

The godwit: the avian antithesis of the fuckwit.

Whoop

“We need to be patient in other aspects of the recovery of these species such as the focus on why these birds [whooping cranes] have trouble reproducing in the wild … That may need to be learnt as well.” (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/science-environment-23892244)

Vacancy advertisement for sex therapist states essential attributes as long legs and whooping.

Pest

“Crop pests have been moving towards the poles at 2.7 kilometres per year, which is very close to the rate of climate change.” (http://www.nature.com/news/crop-pests-advancing-with-global-warming-1.13644)

Keep your eyes peeled: you could see a front of fungi, beetles, true bugs, mites, butterflies, oomycetes, moths, viruses and nematode worms frothing by.