Slow Election

“Scotland is different. At the simplest level, the full Scottish [EU election] result will not be known until Monday because they don’t count votes on the Sabbath in the Western Isles.”

Go the teuchters; resisting the instant information imperative!

Rising Risibly

“I am a Conservative, and I believe in profit and that a rising tide lifts all ships.” Hugo Swire, MP for East Devon

…and strands them all over what used to be low-lying land.