Partricide

“Red-legged partridges fed seeds treated with one neonic died within days. Other researchers found house sparrows became ‘uncoordinated and unable to fly’ and Japanese quail suffered DNA damage after being exposed to the pesticides.” http://www.independent.co.uk/news/science/pesticides-ban-evidence-death-birds-bees-grows-stronger-agriculture-partial-report-a7522391.html

Could you fly a little faster, said the sparrow to the quail,
There’s a partridge right behind me who’s a deadweight on my tail.
We’re flying round in circles, answered quail unto the spug,
I’m feeling rather queasy and my head’s all shot to fug.

Sticklejerk

A kingfisher “kills the fish by striking them against its perch. This softens the stiff spines of the sticklebacks, making them easier to swallow. However, the bird appears to have gone a step further by using the spines to pin three sticklebacks to its regular branch.” http://scottishwildlifetrust.org.uk/article/kingfisher-mystery-in-montrose/

Breakfast cereal for birds: Fish Crispies – slap, stickle, prop; and for tea a little smokie.

Game Gems

Supporting driven grouse shooting at the parliamentary debate on 31 October:

“If you cease burning, you get long, degenerate, rank heather, which is unsightly”
Sir Nicholas Soames (Mid Sussex) (Con) https://goo.gl/NKirCJ

“The main perpetrator of the petition”
Richard Benyon (Newbury) (Con) https://goo.gl/odPPWC

“There were blackcock, golden plover, woodcock, snipe, jack snipe, greylag geese, teal, widgeon, mallard, gadwall, pintail and even, right outt in the middle of the moor, miles from anywhere, a wild chicken. I am not sure whether there are wild chicken, but there was a chicken that was probably not born and brought up there.”
Simon Hart (Carmarthen West and South Pembrokeshire) (Con) https://goo.gl/hVq3Wj

Raptor Fractions

“The number of breeding pairs of hen harriers in England so far this year ranges between 0 and 1.” (https://raptorpersecutionscotland.wordpress.com/2016/06/06/how-many-hen-harriers-breeding-in-england-this-year/)

0.5 of a breeding pair? Just out of interest, is it hermaphrodite?

Please sign the petition to ban driven grouse shooting.

Gastrocomical

“As many as nine out of 10 of the world’s seabirds are likely to have pieces of plastic in their guts, a new study estimates. … ‘It’s pretty astronomical,’ said [the] study coauthor.” (http://www.theguardian.com/environment/2015/sep/01/up-to-90-of-seabirds-have-plastic-in-their-guts-study-finds)

*Gastronomical or plastronomical.

Avoid adding plastic microbeads to the natural environment by using Green People health and beauty products that are 100% natural and certified organic.

In Claw Taste

“Indonesian police have arrested a suspected wildlife smuggler after discovering nearly two dozen rare live birds, mostly yellow-crested cockatoos, jammed inside plastic water bottles in his luggage.” (http://www.theguardian.com/environment/2015/may/06/smuggler-caught-in-indonesia-with-rare-birds-jammed-inside-water-bottles)

The bottles were mostly cocka-cola, tweeted an insider.

Horizontoil

“The eggs of many animals – from trout in the Gulf [of Mexico] to pelicans nesting as far away as Minnesota – have been found to contain oil and the dispersant used by BP in the wake of the [Deepwater Horizon] spill.” (http://www.theguardian.com/environment/2015/mar/31/bp-pr-effort-gulf-coast-deepwater)

Any desirable ‘self-cooking-and-washing-up-after’ properties promoted by BP were met with scepticism by Easter eaters.